May 7, 1999

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This is the card I sent to my mom for Mother's Day. I found it at Amazon.com's new e-card section - and they're free! When you click on the picture, a new page opens up that says, "For making me strong". I liked this one best out of all the choices they had. OK, on with the regular entry.

So after I wrote that lovely entry about my dad on his birthday, my mom was feeling all left out. She e-mailed me asking why I didn't write something nice about her on her birthday. I told her I was saving hers up for Mother's Day. And now she went and ruined the surprise. But I'm still going to do it.

Note: all of this biographical information is from my own hazy memories so I apologize in advance if I got it wrong. Mom, feel free to send corrections.

My mom grew up in a small town (1990 population is about 1100 compared to the giant town I grew up in, population about 2200). She went to college, like her mother before her. I think she started out to be a secretary but she didn't like stenography, so she decided to be a teacher. At that time (mid-60's) those were the standard choices for college educated women. She met my dad at college and they got married soon after. My dad went to work and my mom substitute taught for a while, until she had my brother. She was a full-time stay at home mom for the next 11 years, and she also baby-sat some of my cousins. I admire that so much - I have a lot of fond memories of my mom being at home and I am glad my parents made the necessary sacrifices so that my mom could stay at home with us. When my brother and I got old enough to stay at home alone for a few hours, my mom got a job at the school. She actually got out of work before I got home from school, so she was there for us almost all the time.

My mom is a really fabulous person. Here are the things I remember fondly from growing up:

My mom taught me how to tie my shoes and cut with scissors. I know that sounds pretty basic, but I had trouble with those two things in kindergarten. I think the cutting thing was because I'm left handed and they didn't have the right scissors. I'm not sure about the shoe thing, but I just couldn't get the one loop method. My mom taught me the two loop method that I use to this day, and almost every time I tie my shoes, I think of my mom.

My mom taught me how to ride a bike. I had a lot of trouble learning, but my mom was always patient and never lost her cool. I remember asking her (after the millionth trip up and down the driveway, and me getting no closer to flying solo), "Mom, when I learn how to ride my bike, will you make me a hard boiled egg?" (Apparently, that was a huge treat to me at the time). And she replied, "When you learn how to ride a bike, I'll take you to McDonald's!" What a great deal!

My mom drove me to bowling league, dance lessons, voice lessons, the mall, over to friends' homes and everywhere else I needed to go. She never complained. She almost always took me, unless the weather was bad.

My mom made a home-cooked meal, on the table at 5:00 p.m. every night. Now that I am cooking for myself, I know how monotonous that has to be. She also did all the dishes and cleaning by herself. Every night. I remember a lot of times, sitting in the kitchen while mom did the dishes, just talking. We didn't have a dishwasher until I was about 15 or so. That's a lot of dishes. And she never complained. Looking back, I feel guilty that I never offered to help.

Since my dad is involved in so many things, my mom was really the primary caregiver. I'm not saying my dad wasn't involved in my life - he definitely was - but since my mom was THERE more often, all the petty fights between me and my brother were resolved by her, all the clothes and grocery buying, making school lunches, helping with homework and the rest was done by mom. She also came up with Halloween costumes, decorated the Christmas tree, made Christmas cookies and the rest.

So, I appreciate everything that my mom did so that my brother and I could have a great childhood. I can't imagine that much of it was supremely exciting (although I'm certain that my brother and I were often challenging).

I also appreciate the traits I have gotten from my mother. In an earlier entry, I talked about how when I was younger, people told me I looked just like my dad. I think as I get older, I am slowly turning into my mother in every way except body type. My mom is a little petite flower, and I'm...not.

My mom gave me my voice (whenever I answer the phone at her house, people think I am her), my hair and skin color, my sense of humor, my diplomacy skills, some of my sense of humor (some is from Dad, too). From my mom, I have learned not to take myself too seriously. Also, my mom always encouraged me in whatever I wanted to do - academically, athletically and socially. She never made me feel like I was setting myself up for failure, even when I was. She made me feel that she wanted me to be the best person I could, and that wasn't limited by the fact that I am female. Even though her choices may have been more limited when she was in college, she helped me to feel that there are no limits on what I can do.

My mom had a bit of a health scare a few years back, and I was terrified. She's fine now, thank God. I don't know what I would do without my mom. What I didn't say then, and should have, was this: Mom, I love you. You have given so much of yourself to make me who I am. Thank you. You are the greatest mom in the world.