Normally for a Monday entry, I would do a weekend update type of thing, but I got this survey in an e-mail, and even though I did one of these for an entry once, it was a long time ago, and I probably have some new readers since then. Anyway, I like taking surveys! Plus, since I haven't updated my bio page in forever, it's a good way to get to know all about me. If you're interested.
In other news, my prom date is supposed to go back on trial starting tomorrow, I hear. I don't know much about it. Jen (Bola), if you read this and you know details, e-mail me!
Oh, and also, I'm switching my weblog over to Greymatter probably March 1st. I'm testing it out right now, and I'm trying to give it the same look and feel as the Blogger version. If you want to test it out for me, go here. I have nothing against Blogger, and I wish Ev all the luck in the world, but it's been unreliable at best lately, and the BlogVoices thing was making my page take FOREVER to load. I still think Blogger is great for people who don't have the time or knowledge to do all the tinkering that Greymatter or a custom solution requires. Greymatter runs on my server instead of someone else's server, so hopefully it will be a little more reliable and faster loading. Leave a comment or send me an e-mail and let me know what you think or suggest improvements.
1. What time is it:
10:54 AM on Monday. Normally I would be just getting up right now but I had another dentist's appointment this morning. My dentist loves me -- I pay his mortgage.
2. Name as it appears on your birth certificate:
Kimberly Ann Reed
3. Nicknames:
Kim, Kimmy (I don't like this name, but my grandma uses it, and she's allowed), Kimmer (some of my friends from high school call me this), Kimba (one of my former co-workers used to call me this, although it made me feel slightly elephantine)
4. Parents names:
Larry and Judy
5. Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday cake?
28 (I never know how old I am -- I always have to do the math)
6. Date that you regularly blow them out?
September 19th
7. Pets:
Two cats: Grendel (a.k.a. Grendel Monster, Grendel B. Slendel) and Mia (a.k.a. Mousie, Little Mouse, Fuzzy Black, Mia Bladia)
8. Height:
5' 5" (it's actually a little less than that, but I like to round up)
9. Eye color:
Blue
10. Hair Color:
Brown, although I have blonde and red highlights right now. I hope they are subtle.
11. Piercing:
Ears, one hole each and no desire for more.
12. Tattoos?:
None. I used to want one when I was in college, but I never got around to it, and now I'm kind of glad.
13. How much do you love your job:
Very much. Lots and lots. I work from home! I set my own hours!
14. Hometown:
Caledonia, NY (this is a shout-out to all my homies!)
15. Current Residence:
Syracuse, NY (I don't actually live in the city, but if I told you the name of the town, it wouldn't mean anything if you don't live in the area. Plus, stalkers.)
16. Have you been in love?
Yes
17. Currently in love?
Yes
18. Favorite thing about e-mail:
Each one is like a little present. Except the spam.
19. Been toilet papered?
Like, me personally, or my house? Either way, neither.
20. Loved somebody so much it made you cry?
I don't get this question. Am I supposed to just burst out in tears when I'm in love? Or loved someone so much that they were able to hurt me? Or tears of joy? I've cried tears of joy and tears of sorrow over a loved one. I hope that answers the question.
21. Been in a car crash?
I've been hit from behind once. And one time I swerved to avoid a woodchuck and did a 180, but there were no other cars on the road, and I didn't get any damage.
22. Croutons or Bacon Bits?
Croutons
23. 2 doors or 4 (on a car)?
Four. I don't know why -- I think I have this fantasy that I have all these friends that might need transportation, when in reality it's usually just Jim and me in the car. But I hate trying to get more than two people in a two-door car with the seat leaning and stuff.
24. Coffee or Ice Cream?
Why is this a choice? I can't have both? I guess if I had to have only one for the rest of my life, it would be coffee. I put so much milk and sugar in it, that it's basically like eating melted coffee ice cream.
25. Blanket or Stuffed Animal:
Stuffed animal. This reminds me: I washed all of our bed linens last weekend, including the comforter cover, and somehow my beloved teddy bear got mixed up in the wash. Now, I've had this bear since I was five years old (and yes, I still sleep with it -- shut up). As you can imagine, he's kind of falling apart. So a lot of stuffing fell out in the wash. He's sadder than ever. But I still love him.
26. Best Color:
The best color for me personally, or just in general? I know, you're all like, "Would you just answer the stupid questions!" My favorite color is blue, and I think that's also the color that looks best on me, because it brings out my eyes.
27. Salad Dressing:
Ranch, baby. If that's not available, I like Italian. I never ate salad dressing until I was in college. When I did eat salad before that (which was rare), I ate it plain. What was that about?
28. Socks color:
Black, usually. I wear black boots, so that would look kind of goofy with any other color. In the summer, when I wear socks, they're usually white with sneakers.
29. Book you're reading or hope to read:
Jim and I went to the library last weekend, and I got some books I would never buy. I was in the mood for semi-trashy fiction, so I got: The House Next Door by Anne Rivers Siddons (which was surprisingly good and scary), Velma Still Cooks in Leeway by Vinita Hampton Wright (which was also good, in the Jan Karon vein), King's Oak by Anne Rivers Siddons (which was TERRIBLE! I skipped entire chapters because it was so repetitive and written so terribly. Ugh.) and Stern Men by Elizabeth Gilbert (which is about lobster fishing in New England, and I thought would be kind of a family drama kind of thing, but I read the first chapter and it was so boring that I probably won't finish it unless I'm desperate). I'm also re-reading Monster by John Gregory Dunne which is about how he and his wife (Joan Didion) wrote the script for Up Close and Personal, and how the movie took like eight years to get made, and all of the changes that happened along the way. It's an interesting view of Hollywood. I've been really into books about behind-the-scenes in the movie business lately. I think it's all the DVD directors' commentaries I've been watching.
30. Favorite Movie:
Bring It On, When Harry Met Sally (I know, but it's funny!). I feel like I should throw an intellectual movie in here so you don't all think I'm an idiot, but well, if you read this journal, you know the truth. I like escapism in my movies. The last good movie I saw in a theater was You Can Count On Me, so can you restore some of my credibility?
31. Favorite Food:
Beef stew, my mom's scalloped potatoes and ham, pizza, steak. I'm pretty simple.
32. Song playing at the moment:
None. But if I were playing a song, it would be "Thank You" by Dido because I feel like hearing it. Mary and I were talking about whether I could sing that song. She thinks I can (thank, Mar!) but I don't think I could pull off the octave jump on "And I...I want to thank you for giving me the best days of my life." It's a bit too high for me.
33. Toothpaste:
I have no idea. It's something for sensitive teeth (see reason why I am up so early today).
34. Favorite Restaurant:
The Mission (Mexican) or Saratoga Steak House
35. Flower:
I know nothing about flowers. I like roses, I guess. I'm more into the arrangement and the color than the actual flower.
36. Least Favorite Food:
Mushrooms. I can't deal with the texture. Someone tried to tell me that portobello (sp?) mushrooms taste like meat, and they totally don't. They taste like mushrooms.
37. Sport to Watch:
College basketball. I don't watch it often, but I do like it.
38. Fast Food Restaurant:
McDonald's, all the way. Which reminds me, I haven't been in a while. I have to be careful, because I know that Jim will NEVER say no if I ask him to stop at McDonald's. So I don't ask all that often. Even working there for three months couldn't cure my obsession.
39. When was your last hospital visit?
Never been to the hospital personally. I actually haven't been inside an actual hospital in a long time. But I took Jim to Urgent Care this summer for his ankle.
40. Favorite drink?
Like, alcoholic? I'm not a big mixed drink gal. Probably a screwdriver or a gin and tonic or something. Non-alcoholic: Pepsi One. I am single-handedly keeping that brand on the shelves, I think.
41. What color is your bedroom carpet?
Well, there's this shit brown wall-to-wall, and then a room-sized area rug on top of it that's ivory and blue. Of course, you can't tell with all the clothes on the floor.
42. How many times did you fail your Permit and/or Drivers test?
I didn't fail any. I thought I failed my driver's test because I hit the curb while parallel parking, but my instructor let me pull forward and try again, and I did just fine. I think I'm actually a pretty good parallel parker, which is weird, because I SUCK at driving in reverse.
43. Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
I have no idea. Isn't that the exciting thing? Um, probably still in Syracuse. Still with Jim. Hopefully in a house. With a dog. Beyond that, I have no idea.
44. Have you ever been convicted of a crime?
Nope. Not even a speeding ticket. I'm so boring.
45. Which single store would you choose to max your credit card?
Target. Look at all the choices!
46. What do you do most often when you are bored?
Go online and read boards on MBTV for shows I don't recap. Normally I don't have time to do that, but I do like reading the boards for ER and Survivor.
47. What words or phrases do you over use?
In writing, I tend to start new paragraphs with "Anyway" or "So". I always have to go back through my recaps and take those out.
48. Friend who lives farthest away?
Justin lives in San Diego, so I guess he wins. Ken doesn't live anywhere right now, but he's currently in Australia.
49. Most annoying thing:
Indecision. My own and that of others.
50. Best thing in the world?
My life in general. I'm pretty happy. Jim, my cats, my friends, my work.
51. Bedtime:
Oh, God. It varies wildly. Hardly ever before midnight. Anywhere between 1 AM (rarely) and 5 AM. Usually by about 3 AM, unless I'm working on something.
So, that's that! Hope you enjoyed it. I tried to make it a little more interesting than just one-word answers. It's almost like an entry!
Has it really been two weeks? I'm awfully sorry about that.
Anyway, here's what's been doing. I did my taxes over. The first time through, I was really overtired and I screwed up. I'm using TurboTax (because of the Schedule C thing) and I entered some deductions in one place, then decided it belonged elsewhere, so I took the data out. Then I forgot to put it back into the right place. So the first time through, I owed the government over $1000. I nearly threw up. But after redoing it, I only owe $44. Whew! And I got a refund from the state, even. Very exciting.
Valentine's Day. Jim gave me my presents the day before, for no particular reason. We don't generally make a big deal out of Valentine's Day because, well, it's kind of dumb. Also, our anniversary is less than a month later, and that's more important to us. So he gave me some pajama pants from Old Navy (because that's what I wear pretty much every day) and the Bring It On DVD. He rocks. I've already watched it about seven times. On the actual day, I was planning something, but then I didn't feel that great, so we postponed it to the next day. I made Jim's favorite meal (beef stew, for those of you playing the home game) and this excellent chocolate mousse for dessert. And I lit candles and put music on -- the whole nine yards. We even ate at the kitchen table, which I think we have done maybe three times since we've lived in this apartment. It was very nice.
Last weekend, on Saturday, Mary and I went out to dinner at this place called Delmonico's. We had a long wait for our table, but that's okay because we hadn't seen each other in a while and had a lot of catching up to do. We were standing in the bar, waiting, and there was this really obnoxious group of women (and men) standing near us. They were screeching and laughing overly loud. Mary remarked that having friends like that would be her personal idea of hell -- their whole conversation consisted of really superficial things -- hair color, clothing, crap like that. Of course, we talk about the same things sometimes. We just don't screech about it. Anyway, the food was good, and then we went back to Mar's apartment and watched Bring It On on DVD. Awesome night.
Sunday, we went over to Jim's parents' house and played cards. Jim's brother had gone ice fishing at some point, so he fried up a bunch of fish, and it was the best fish I've ever had. Man, that was good. I wish I had some right now. Jim's dad nearly beat my record for most "goose eggs" (zero points on a hand) in a row. My record is eight, and he got up to eight, but then Helen shot the moon, so he got twenty-six points, along with the rest of us. Whew! That was a close one. Good times.
Longtime readers may remember that Jim gave me a gift certificate for a day of beauty at a local spa for my birthday in September. My brother and I chipped in and got the same thing for my mom for Christmas. So Tuesday, my mom came out and we went on our little adventure. She arrived at my apartment about half an hour early, and I had made cinnamon rolls, and coffee. She also gave me some china tea cups and saucers that my grandmother was getting rid of for some reason. Too bad I don't have a china cabinet to show them off! Maybe someday.
Anyway, we went to the salon (it's the same place I get my haircut). Unbeknownst to my mother, I had also made us both appointments to get manicures after the treatments. I was escorted into a private room, where I changed into a robe. The lady came back in and started the treatments. I got a facial that had about ten steps in the process. In between steps, she would do other things. One step was called "arm and leg hydration" or something, which was basically rubbing lotion on my arms and legs. But it felt really good. I also had the paraffin dip done to my hands and feet. I don't know if you've ever had that done. It's interesting. You dip your hands and feet into really, really hot wax. The first time I did it, I thought maybe they made a mistake and it was too hot, but that's really hot it goes. Then they tie your hands and feet into plastic baggies and put mitts over them. After a while, they pull the whole thing off and it takes all the dead skin with it. It sounds barbaric, but it's actually pretty cool and it feels really good. I also got a back and neck massage, which I wish could have lasted about three more days.
After all my treatments, I got dressed and went back out to the waiting area. My mom came out, and then got her manicure. She'd never gotten a manicure before, so I was pretty excited about it. I hope she was too. My manicure came next, but you know, I've had them before, so it wasn't quite as big of a deal. It's still nice though.
After all of the beauty-making was done, we went out to lunch. We couldn't find a parking spot near the restaurant, so we parked about four blocks away. The weather was beautiful! It's been in the teens and twenties here for the most part, and Tuesday it was in the forties. We left our coats in the car and soaked in the sunshine while we walked. I took my mom to The Mission, a Mexican restaurant. I've always had good food there, but this time I got the three-cheese enchilada, and it was...not so good. I mean, it was fine, but there was something in either the cheese or the sauce that I didn't like. I kept thinking of Ross on Friends: "It tastes like feet!" My mom liked her food, though. After we finished, she brought me home and then took off. All in all, it was a great mother-daughter day, and I think my mom really had a good time. She's never been one to pamper herself like that (even though she certainly deserves to) so I was glad that she had the opportunity, and that I got to share it with her.
Since then, there's been a lot of recap writing, and a lot of test grading. My students' final projects are due on February 27th, and I have to turn in their grades on March 1st, meaning that I have two days to grade them all. Compounding matters, The Mole is showing two episodes next week -- one on the 27th, and one on the 28th. And there's the usual RW/RR Challenge on the 27th. Plus, I'm recapping that Judy Garland movie on ABC on the 25th. So next week will be busy, to say the least. But then I'll have lots more time. I'm only teaching one section next quarter, instead of two, and it doesn't start until March 12th. I'm going to Austin for SXSW Interaction from March 10th-14th. But between March 1st and March 10th, I hope to change some things around on this site. Hopefully. I'm not making any promises. Thanks for hanging in there!
I haven't posted in a while, because I just haven't had anything to say. But I'm trying to be better about updating, and usually once I start typing, I think of something. So here goes.
Today, I had a root canal. People always make it out like root canals are just the worst thing that could happen to you. I don't get it. It really didn't hurt. The shot didn't hurt. The procedure didn't hurt. The only thing that was more annoying than painful was having to hold my mouth open for nearly an hour -- my jaw was a little sore. And now that the novocaine has worn off, my gums are a little tender where the shot went in, but only when I press on the spot with my tongue. Which of course, I do about ten times per minute. What is that about -- when you have a sensitive spot in your teeth, you have to mess around with it, even though it hurts. Anyway, my dentist rocks the casbah. He explained the whole procedure to me, what they would be doing, drew me a little picture, showed me the various instruments, told me the steps, everything. I'm the type of person who wants to have as much information as possible going in. But then once the procedure starts, I don't need a play-by-play, and he doesn't do that, except to say, "Only a few more minutes, and then we have to do an X-ray," or something like that. He is so awesome -- totally nonjudgmental, doesn't yell at me if I don't floss twice a day, but really gives the impression that he cares and wants my experience to be as painless as possible. I love you, Dr. Levy!
What else is going on? My youngest cousin (I think he's about fifteen or sixteen) got hit in the eye with a snowball. It was really hurting him, so my aunt called the doctor, who told her that as long as the eyeball itself wasn't scratched or bleeding, there was nothing they could do but ice it. When it was still hurting him a lot a few hours later, my aunt took him to the emergency room, and they sent him to a specialist at another hospital. Turns out there was bleeding behind the eye, and if he hadn't gotten it looked at, he probably would have lost his vision in that eye. Since they can't do a lot to bandage it, he just has to be incredibly still. He's out of school for two weeks, no physical activity, no reading. He can watch television, but only a little at a time. They have to be careful when he's riding in a car not to go over a lot of bumps, or the bleeding might start up again. That would suck so bad. I wish I knew what kind of music he liked because I would send him a CD or something -- I can't think of anything else he can do to pass the time!
I'm probably going to Austin for SXSW -- I'm just waiting to hear some confirmations on the travel and accomodations. I'm pretty excited even though I have no legit reason to go other than to hang out with Wing, Sars, and Pamie and meet stee. That's enough, though, right? There are a lot of other people I would like to meet, but I don't know if they will even know who the hell I am. I was completely shocked the other day when Jason Kottke posted a link to my site on Metafilter. Jason Kottke knows who I am? So I guess that's one more person I would like to meet. It should be interesting, anyway. I always feel like I fly under the radar in both the journal and weblog communities. I keep up on the hot topics in both worlds, but I don't really contribute anything to either. I've never been nominated for a Diarist Award. Well, people have told me they've nominated me, but I've never made the finalist list. I can understand it thought -- my entries tend to be all over the place and thus don't fit into any of the existing categories, and I'm not a new journal anymore, and I certainly haven't been around long enough or made enough contributions to be a Legacy Award nominee. I am coming up on two years of this journal, though. I'll have to think of something cool to do to recognize the day. Maybe a contest or something.
And finally, I posted this in the weblog, but in case you didn't see it: Family Christmas Pictures. The first one of me is so ridiculously terrible that I had to put it up. I'm working on captions so that you know who the hell these people are.
And also -- hi Stacey! Why don't you e-mail me once in a while?
I just got back from a weekend in Toronto, so I thought I would post about it while it's all fresh in my mind. Plus, I'm bored. I wish I had taken some pictures to share, but I didn't. I actually did try to take one of the snow falling, from Wing's office window, but by the time I had looked out the window, thought to myself that it looked pretty, gone downstairs, dug out my camera, walked back upstairs, and got into position, it wasn't so pretty anymore. What had started out as pretty twirling snowflakes dancing over the rooftops of the neighborhood (or, since it was Canada, neighbourhood) had become, well, a regular snowing-type picture. So, no pictures.
Anyway, this whole trip was sort of last-minute. Last week, Wing mentioned that Glark was going to San Francisco on business, so it would be a great opportunity for me to come visit and we could have some girly time together. It sounded great to me, and I agreed. Then, I was struck down with the never-ending cold of 2001. It started Saturday night, and really just hung in there. You know how usually when you get a cold, you start to feel it coming on, and then the next day is the worst one where all of your symptoms are at their most intense, and you spend the whole day lying in bed and blowing your nose and mainlining your cold remedy of choice. Then the following day, things are usually a bit better, and you actually feel like eating a little, and you move to the couch and blow your nose some more, and even get on the computer for a bit. The third day, you're usually pretty much back to normal, albeit with some residual effects -- dry skin around your nose and mouth, perhaps a lingering cough. Anyway, that's how it usually works for me, but this time that first day was strung over three or four days, with no relief in sight. Plus, even though I have the luxury of working from home, and a fairly flexible schedule, the downside is that I can't really stay home sick -- if I'm home, and it's during the day, I feel like I should be doing SOMETHING constructive. I need to get over that. Suffice to say, I wasn't entirely sure until Thursday that I was actually going to Toronto, because I didn't know if I would have enough energy to drive the four hours, much less be any fun once I got there. But Thursday dawned and I felt much better, so the trip was on.
The other mitigating factor was that last week was not Wing's best ever, as she has documented in her own journal, so I didn't want her to feel like on top of all of her other worries, she had to worry about being a hostess. I think I'm a pretty low-maintenance guest, but anytime someone comes to visit, even a good friend, I know you feel like you have to at least get out the guest bedding and stock up on snacks. So there was that too.
But Friday morning dawned, and Jim dropped me off at the car rental place. When I went inside, the woman asked me what kind of car I wanted. I replied, "The cheap kind." But then she told me for $2 extra per day, I could get a car with cruise control, which sounded like a good deal to me. So I opted for that one, which turned out to be a Chevy Malibu. Molly used to own one of them, and it was fine driving. Plus, cruise control. Plus, automatic windows. After driving our mid-90s Saturn that has nearly 80,000 miles on it, it was a nice change to drive something a little more luxurious. I mean, it wasn't a Cadillac or anything, but it was nice. It made the driving part a lot more fun.
After a quick stop at Dunkin' Donuts for a drink and bagel, I hit the Thruway. It was kind of sunny, and the roads were fairly empty, and I ended up making really good time. I do sort of turn into George Costanza on road trips like that, especially when I'm by myself -- I become obsessed with making good time. I place little bets with myself, like, "I bet I can make it to the border by 11 AM." I'm lucky that I haven't gotten a ticket, although the cruise control helped to keep my lead foot under control.
I arrived at Chez Wing around noon, a little earlier than I expected. I managed to even figure out their whole parking situation, which is probably completely obvious to anyone who has lived in a real city, but which I find confusing because it involves driving down some sort of alley and then parking in another sort-of alley. I called her from my cell phone to tell her I was there, and she came out to greet me. Once inside, I went up to the offices where she and Niki were working. They let me play on Glark's computer, since he wasn't there, and we gossiped and gabbed while Wing finished writing a very funny FAQ for the Survivor boards on MBTV. After the work was done, we decided to go see a movie, and since nothing good (and I mean NOTHING good) came out this weekend, we ended up seeing You Can Count On Me. We bought our tickets first and then went to eat in a nearby diner to kill some time before showtime.
We entered and waited by the sign that said, "Please wait to be seated." And this lady (who was wearing an apron, so I assume she worked there and wasn't just a random apron-wearing lady roaming the streets) looked at us and then ignored us. Then she looked at us again, and I think we all must have given her the, "Yes, please seat us!" look because she kind of acknowledged us, but still made no effort to come up to us. After a few minutes, she seated us, but the whole thing was very nonchalant, like, "I guess I'll seat you, but I don't know why you don't seat yourselves." Because we follow directions! The sign told us to wait to be seated, and we did! We also had a strange waiter. He kind of looked like John Malcovich, now that I think of it. He was just very perfunctory. As we were finishing up (and really hoping he would bring the check soon, because we had a movie to catch and all), a gentleman who I'm going to assume was poor or possibly indigent sat down next to us. Niki was kind enough to pick up the tab for our meals, and we thanked her, and the guy next to us made some remark about Niki paying for his meal as well. We gave him that "Heh, yeah." nod and smile. Then he got into a detailed discussion with the perfunctory waiter about the various types of salads available. As we were leaving, the waiter had just brought him some sort of salad with chicken on top, and there was a problem, and the waiter snatched it away snootily. All in all, a weird diner experience.
The movie was really, really great. Even though the boom mike shows up a few times. Hey, it was low-budget. But I highly recommend it, if it's still playing in your town. The only thing that bugged me a little was that Matthew Broderick was very Ferris and it was kind of distracting.
Then Wing and I parted ways with Niki. We gathered up some snacks (and I learned again that I really like pitas and tzatziki, and have to remember to buy some next time we go to the store), and retired to the game room to watch Popstars. Or maybe the snacks came later. I don't know. All I know is that Wing sure knows how to stock up on snacks.
We ended up turning in fairly early (for us). Wing had gotten some good news earlier that day, which I'm sure had the effect of relaxing her. I know she hadn't been sleeping well all week, and I hope the latest turn of events helped to free up her mind a little bit.
We slept late, as usual, and then spent the whole day in our pajamas, chatting, snacking, and watching television. It was great. We watched Being John Malcovich on DVD, because I'd never seen it. I enjoyed that as well. Mostly, we just flipped through the channels and chatted. Wing shared some pictures with me of her younger years. I love looking at pictures, especially of people I didn't know as children. Since I've only known Wing for a few years, it really gave me a kind of historical perspective. Plus, I got to see pictures of Glark with long hair, and others with no beard, which were funny. Plus, lots and lots of pictures of Baby Glark, naked. You can't get enough of that.
We stayed up until 5 AM talking and finally dragged ourselves to bed again. Today I woke up, showered, and went on my merry way. The drive back was just as pleasant, and featured lots of good music on the radio. I was enjoying myself so much that when I stopped at a Thruway rest stop to eat, I bought myself a copy of "The Star" featuring Best and Worst Dressed at the Golden Globes and got my food to eat in. I spent a blissful forty-five minutes or so eating my food and reading my trashy tabloid before heading out on the highway again. As I approached Syracuse, I had the feeling that I could drive forever -- it was just such a good day for driving, and I was in that kind of mood.
But once I got home, I was really glad to be home. While I was gone, Jim upgraded our computer with more RAM, a new CD burner, and Windows and Office 2000. It was so great to see him and the cats (and I think they missed me a little bit too). I talked to my mom and my grandmother on the phone. I started the slow process of restoring all of my default settings on the computer. I watched Oz and snuggled with Jim on the couch. I tried to figure out why the hell the computer wouldn't auto-detect the Zip drive. I ate some leftover pizza. It was a good weekend.
This week, I'm doing the usual recapping and teacher-type stuff. I finally finished grading the first take-home exams the day before I left for Toronto, and they have another one due this Tuesday. At least now I know what to expect! Also, I'm having a root canal done on Thursday. As you probably expect, I'm not very excited about that, but it has to be done. I'm trying to justify the expense of going to SXSW in March. I have no real business reason to go -- I just think it would be a lot of fun. Wing and Sars are going, and generously offered to let me share their hotel room. Anyway, I'm working on figuring out if it makes sense. Or, I should say, working on making it make sense. I have to do my taxes this week, too. Maybe I'll suddenly discover that I'm owed a huge refund. Wouldn't that be exciting? I doubt it will happen, or more likely, if I do get a refund, Jim will have to pay the same exact amount (that's what happened last year) and kind of cancel it out.
Whew! This is super long. I hope you all had a good weekend.
I'm still recovering from my cold, so I apologize if this entry is filled with fuzzy thinking, or makes no sense. It's just something I've been thinking about a lot this week, and I wanted to get it all down.
I was struck by this quote on peterme.com: "Among the most eye-opening aspects of working at Walmart.com is how it is all about money. I've never worked in such an environment before (occupational history includes universities, cd-rom publishers run by communists, elite design agencies, and irrationally exuberant dot coms), and it's startling. I wonder if this is the environment most people operate in. Frankly, this cold water slap of market reality is refreshing."
I had a number of general managers when I worked at Borders who took the attitude that, "We love books. Our job is to bring good books to the masses. Making money is just a nice benefit of that." It's a fine attitude, and one I bought into when I got a job there right out of college, but it won't work for a company that needs to make money to survive (i.e. any for-profit company). Then, I got a new general manager, who still loved books, and who still liked to read, but who made no secrets about the fact that our store was there to make money. And it was still fun to work there (actually more fun, because since our store was actually making money, we could afford to hire enough workers). We all worked very hard, and we reaped the profits. When I got promoted to the corporate offices, I was surprised by all the people who still held the "money is dirty" belief. God forbid you suggest that we actually try to convince people to buy books that were popular. They couldn't understand that just because you or I might not like a particular book, or think the content was worth the paper it was printed on, others might want to buy it. And that it was okay for us to sell it to them, because if we didn't, they would just buy it somewhere else. I still think that it can be fun, and fulfilling, to work at a company that actually talks about ways to make money, instead of pretending that it's beneath them.
I will admit that I don't have a very good grasp on economics, but this is my understanding of capitalism. The point is to make money. Companies that take in more money than they spend are considered successful. Investors want to take part in the success, and if the company is public, they can buy shares in that company. As the company continues to make money, more people will want in, driving the stock price up. Okay, that's WAY oversimplified, but that's my basic understanding.
It seems like in the past five years or so, with the advent of dot-coms, some people didn't want that to be true anymore. Companies were rewarded in the stock market based on the promise of future revenue (at least that's the only reason I can think of). Others saw this happening and wanted in on the gravy train. There was a bit of a frenzy.
And I think eventually, we all knew that it was doomed to fail. In our capitalist system, companies have to take in more money than they spend. Investors are only willing to wait so long before they see a profit. Promises of future revenue will only work for so long. And I think that's what's happening now. It's more like a correction than anything else.
That's why it bugs me when I see victims of the dot-com layoffs saying that "capitalism failed them." Actually, in my opinion, capitalism succeeded. It just took a little longer than usual, because people were kind of blinded by all the new types of businesses out there (and it could be argued that they weren't new types of businesses at all, but just new ways of accomplishing the same old task of parting consumers from their dollars). Investors couldn't point to past experience and say, "This type of company will do well, and this one won't," because these companies were doing something new. That's not to say that I don't feel sympathy for all the people who are losing their jobs right now. I do. But until the web came along, if a start-up business didn't make money fairly quickly, it failed.
And another thing that really sucks is that things seem to be swinging too far in the opposite direction. Companies or business models that have the potential to be successful are overlooked if they have anything to do with the web. Even those that are currently making money. I hope that in the next few months, things will start to stabilize, and investors will be able to look more objectively at businesses. Whereas before, appending "dot-com" to your company name seemed like you would automatically generate a lot of money on the stock market, now it seems like the same thing will cause investors to run in the opposite direction, and that's not really fair either.
Throughout the whole dot-com mania of the past few years, I felt like I must be missing something important. I didn't understand how these companies could continue to survive while losing money. Again, I'm not happy that they failed, and that so many people are out of work, but at least I know that I wasn't being stupid.
It's kind of a scary time, isn't it? At least for me, it is. Besides the economic downturn, I'm frightened by what I see about Bush's presidency. Ashcroft's confirmation. The chipping away at abortion rights. The increased power given to religion (at least, Christian religion) in the government.
But I firmly believe that everything is cyclical, and that we all just have to ride it out. I'm not saying we should sit on our hands and do nothing, but I'm also saying that I guess at heart I am an optimist, and I think that when things are bad, that just means that soon they will be good. We were due for a recession, unfortunately. It's going to suck. It's going to be hard. But I really believe that eventually things will turn back around. Just like when things were flying high, I knew there would be a crash eventually.
So these are the things on my mind lately. Besides trying to figure out what kind of cold medicine to take, that is.