KIM: So, everybody wants to hear the story of how we got engaged.
JIM: Yep.
KIM: There's not really a story, per se...
JIM: There's always a story.
KIM: But it's not the kind of story that people are expecting. Like, you didn't hide the ring in my ice cream or something. I mean, there wasn't even a ring, really.
JIM: Oh, there was a ring.
KIM: Yeah, I know. But it wasn't THE ring.
JIM: Is that my fault? You wanted to pick out your own ring.
KIM: I know! I'm not complaining. I mean, it was perfect. But it wasn't much of a story.
JIM: I see what you're saying. Maybe you should make something up.
KIM: Why would I make something up?
JIM: To satisfy the people who want a story.
KIM: Well, what would I say?
JIM: Tell them that I took you on a hot air balloon ride, and then I released some doves, and then proposed, and then we had a champagne toast at sunset.
KIM: Okay, first of all, anyone who knows you at all knows that isn't true. And anyone who knows me at all knows that I would have laughed at the idea.
JIM: What? You said you wanted a story.
KIM: Well, why don't we just tell them what actually happened. I guess that constitutes a story.
JIM: Be my guest.
KIM: Okay, well, I've been bugging you to get engaged for like...
JIM: Since our one year anniversary?
KIM: Just about. And in retrospect, that would have been a terrible idea.
JIM: Which is why you should always listen to me.
KIM: Fat chance. Anyway, I would bring it up about every six months or so, and you would always say that you didn't feel like the time was right, and that you wanted to get married, to me, but just not right then.
JIM: Well, would you want to marry someone who didn't want to get married?
KIM: Not at all. So back in August, I brought up marriage AGAIN, and you told me that you were planning on proposing in September, when we went to my grandparents' cottage for a long weekend.
JIM: Right.
KIM: But then you decided that you couldn't do it then, because I knew about it and you wanted it to be a surprise.
JIM: Exactly.
KIM: Which is about the meanest thing you've ever done.
JIM: Heh.
KIM: So I thought maybe you were trying to double fake me out, and really you were going to propose then anyway, and I kept trying to maneuver us into romantic situations, like, "Let's go out and look at the stars!" But no dice.
JIM: I'm on my own schedule.
KIM: Apparently. So then when we got back, I kept trying to plan romantic places to go, hoping that you would be inspired. Little did I know that you had picked another date in your mind.
JIM: Well, I told you that.
KIM: Later, you told me that. So then I was going crazy trying to figure out what date it was. And you've always said that you didn't want to propose on a big day, like Christmas, or my birthday. So basically, I had no clue.
JIM: I know. Heh.
KIM: And then it was Halloween. And I had to pick you up from work. And I was all unshowered, and wearing sweatpants, and the whole way home, I was babbling about nothing, as usual. And meanwhile, you knew that as soon as we got home, you were going to ask me.
JIM: I know! You would not shut up. I love you, but you would not shut up.
KIM: So when we got home, I asked you to put the candy for the trick or treaters out by the front door, so we would be ready, and then I started making dinner. Lemon garlic chicken.
JIM: You were really obsessed with the chicken.
KIM: I was hungry! I didn't know! And then you started with, "I really missed you at work today." And I was all, "Oh, that's sweet! I missed you too!" But I was thinking, "What is his problem? Why is he telling me how much he missed me?"
JIM: You're so romantic.
KIM: I was trying to make dinner! Usually when you get home from work, you go watch TV or play a game or something, so I couldn't figure out why you were acting so weird.
JIM: Thanks.
KIM: You know what I mean. So you walked over to me, and just blurted out, "Do you want to get married?" and handed me a ring that I already owned, as a symbol.
JIM: At least I had a ring.
KIM: And I was so surprised that I kind of didn't hear you at first, and couldn't believe what you said. So I was all, "Wait. What? Really? Wait. No! Do it over! You have to get down on one knee!"
JIM: You are such a control freak. But you're my control freak.
KIM: Well, it's a big moment in a girl's life! I didn't want to always remember lemon garlic chicken. It's like in Singles where Kyra Sedgwick says she'll always remember that chili dog.
JIM: So I got down on one knee and asked you again.
KIM: And you said some other nice things, which I'm keeping for myself, and I said yes! You did kind of just blurt it out.
JIM: I was nervous!
KIM: Why? It's not like you thought I was going to say no.
JIM: Well, but I knew you wanted it to be special, and I was afraid I would screw it up.
KIM: Aw, you did a great job. Really, it's just the asking part that's important. Everything else is just frosting.
JIM: Or lemon garlic chicken, as the case may be.
KIM: I don't know why I'm surprised that you just blurted it out. Like the first time you told me you loved me, you blurted then too. Remember?
JIM: Yeah, it was in the laundry room at your townhouse senior year. You were sad. I wanted to cheer you up.
KIM: What was I sad about?
JIM: I don't know. Probably roommate issues or something. But I had been thinking about saying it for a while, and that was the first opportunity.
KIM: It was sweet. I totally remember that. And you also blurted out to your parents that you were moving out of their house and in with me.
JIM: Well, we were coming home from church, and I had planned to tell them on the way home from church, and my mom just kept going on and on about the lesbian nuns, and she wouldn't shut up.
KIM: The lesbian nuns?
JIM: I don't know. She was in the convent before she married my dad, and apparently some of the nuns were lesbians. So when she finally took a breath, I grabbed the opportunity.
KIM: And then you moved out on your mom's birthday. I'm surprised she even speaks to me.
JIM: She got over it. I'm the youngest of five -- my parents were just tired by the time I came around. They didn't really care.
KIM: That's not true. They were very happy when you told them we were getting married.
JIM: I think my mom had given up hope.
KIM: Of course, you did it by leaving a message on their answering machine.
JIM: Well, they weren't home. What was I supposed to do?
KIM: But the point is that you're kind of a blurter. So it was appropriate that you blurted your marriage proposal. Anyway, so that's the story. And then we went and picked out a ring, and now we're planning the wedding.
JIM: You're planning the wedding, really.
KIM: With your input.
JIM: If you say so.
KIM: Whatever. Anyway, is there anything about being engaged that has taken you by surprise?
JIM: What do you mean?
KIM: Well, I guess since we've been together for almost eight years, I didn't think it would be a big deal when we got engaged. Like, I didn't think our families would be that excited about it. I figured they had given up on us.
JIM: And you think they're excited?
KIM: Oh my God, they're totally excited. And happy for us.
JIM: Well, I can't think of anything that surprises me, but I like being engaged. And I will like being married to you, too.
KIM: Aw. I can't wait to get married. Well, I can wait. Until next October. But being engaged is fun too. I'm enjoying it. I love my ring. I love being able to buy bridal magazines and not feeling like someone is going to take them away from me because I'm not engaged. I love calling you my fiance. Well, I'm not really used to that last part, but I'm sure that I will be. I'm excited to have a nice, fun party for all of our families and friends. And it kind of weirds me out to think that a year from now, we'll be husband and wife. Hee! See, it sounds funny to me.
JIM: Do you think we can register at Noble's Electronics?
KIM: We'll talk about that later.
I swear, every time I write an entry, I tell myself I'll start updating more often. And then I don't. Anyway. Click on the little pictures to see a bigger version.
This picture is of Terry, goofing around as usual. Let's see. Way back on the first Saturday in October, Mary threw a surprise 30th birthday party for Terry. We were supposed to be there by 2 PM, so around 1 PM, Jim and I ran out to the bookstore to get Terry's gift. We were standing in line, and I realized that I didn't have a card, so Jim held our spot while I ran over to the rack of greeting cards. As I was running back, I heard someone call my name. I looked over -- and it was Terry. Shit! Our friend Chris was supposed to take Terry out that morning to get him out of the house, and I guess they decided to stop by the book store. I hid the card under my arm, like I couldn't have just lied and said it was for a relative or something. And frankly, like Terry would have noticed. I love him, but he's not the most observant guy in the world. So I'm all panicky and trying to shake Terry while also trying to get back in line before it was our turn. Terry was following me, clueless. I got up to the register. Terry was standing right there. So I'm whispering to the cashier that I needed a gift certificate. The cashier clearly thought I was insane. Finally, Jim and Chris managed to get Terry to step a few feet away so that I could complete my transaction in peace. As we left, I lied that we were going to Jim's parents' house, so then I was all worried that Terry would see that we went the wrong way out of the parking lot. Like Terry knows where Jim's parents live. I'm so bad at espionage. It was funny though, when Terry finally arrived at the party, because I could finally explain why I had acted so weird. Of course, Ter had no clue. About me or the party.
This picture is of Terry and his brother Randy. But I was hardly the guest of honor at the party. Mary had somehow managed to get Terry's parents and brother Mark to fly out from Phoenix, and Terry's brother Rand to fly out from Houston. I'm still not quite sure how Mary managed to arrange all of this without Terry finding out, or without driving herself insane. But it was impressive. So Terry walked in, and we all yelled surprise, but his family was hiding down in the basement. Ter greeted all of his friends and stuff, and then when he walked into the living room, his family came out and greeted him. He was so shocked! It took him a while to figure out what was going on. I thought that was a great present. Mary's a good wife.
Aw, here's Terry and Mary. Check out Mary's new red hair! Well, it's not that new anymore, but it was when this picture was taken. Back in early October. So we all hung out and chatted and there was general revelry. Luckily, it was a really nice day outside, so some people could hang out on the lawn, because the house isn't really that big. I'm sure I've explained this before, but Stimp lives on the first floor -- I think he lives alone now, but he has had various roommates over the past few years. Mary and Terry live on the second floor in a very small apartment. So the party was throughout the whole house. The scariest moment came when Mary's little niece (who looks exactly like Cindy Lou Who) fell down the stairs. We all heard "Thump thump thump. Thump." And then she was just lying there, not moving. But she was fine. Just scared. I saw her chowing down on some cake later. All in all, it was a really nice party, and Terry got some great presents, including the Simpsons DVD box set, which Jim nearly pocketed. He also got a LOT of gift certificates. I've got to throw myself a birthday party. You really clean up. Hey, and I'll be thirty next September! I had better start planning now.
So then the day after that, Sunday, I went to visit my parents and to see Brenda's baby. Gretchen (who lives in Atlanta) had decided to come into town secretly and surprise Brenda. I knew about it, so I planned a trip home at the same time. If you read my weblog, you may remember me being secretive about my weekend plans. That's because I had a surprise birthday party on Saturday and a surprise visitor for Brenda on Sunday! And you never know who's reading. So I drove to my parents' house on Sunday. When I got there, my mom told me that Nan (my grandma) had some kittens living on her enclosed back porch. There had been a cat that Nan thought was a stray or a barn cat from a nearby farm hanging out lately. Largely because Nan is a softie and was feeding it. So then the cat was pregnant. And she gave birth behind Nan's garage. Only two kittens surivived, so Nan took them onto her porch to protect them from the elements (and the wildlife), and let the mother cat on to feed them, etc. So my mom asked me if I wanted to go out and see the kittens. Did I? There's one of them above.
We got out there, and the kittens were just the cutest thing ever. This one is named Smoky. I was really worried that I would accidentally end up taking one of them home, especially since Nan didn't have homes for them. But I knew that Nan is as much of a softie as I am, and would end up keeping them if she couldn't find owners. She ended up giving the orange one away (to one of my high school classmates actually) and keeping the gray one, whom she named Smoky. So now Nan calls me with all of her cat questions. I'm not sure how I became the cat expert in the family. Both of my aunts have cats too. I guess by owning three, I trumped them. My brother pointed out the other day that at least I don't live alone with three cats. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But I guess that Jim is the only thing keeping me from being the Crazy Cat Lady these days. I'm sorry, but how freaking cute are those kittens? After I got home, I e-mailed my mom the picture of Smoky with the ceramic frog with a caption that said, "I think this guy wants to come live with you." But my mom had cats for many years, and she has always vowed never to own a pet again. We'll see about that. So the story has a happy ending, since both kittens now have loving, responsible owners. Oh, and Nan found out that the mother belongs to her neighbor a few doors down. Who are not such loving, responsible neighbors. But I won't go on a rant about that right now. Except to ask everyone, like Bob Barker, to please spay or neuter your pets. It doesn't cost THAT much, and there are low-fee options. Even if your pet is indoor only. Especially if they're not spayed or neutered, they will find a way to get out. Okay, I'm done.
So after visiting Nan and the kittens, it was time to go visit Brenda and Matt and baby Alex. Gretchen called to let me know that she was at her mom's house (across the street from my mom's house) and we drove out to Brenda's. Alex is just the best baby. He didn't cry once, and we were there for probably three hours or so. He fussed a little bit when he was hungry, but that was it. Brenda and Matt seemed very happy, but very tired. Brenda worked it out so that she doesn't have to go back to work until after the holidays, and I'm glad she gets that much time with Alex! I know she will have a hard time going back, but as a medical professional, she gets a really flexible schedule, and I think she'll only be working three or four days a week, and it will still be full time. And her mom is going to help her out with Alex. It sounds like the best possible situation for her.
I was the first one to hold the baby. I know some people are scared to hold babies, especially before their necks are developed, but I love it. They're so easy! It's when they get older that things get difficult, I think. It was great to have a chance to visit with Brenda and Gretchen, especially. I just don't see them often enough. I also got to catch up with a high school classmate of mine, who is really good friends with Matt, who just moved here to Syracuse. So we were all swapping ideas about the best neighborhoods in which to live, since he and his wife are house hunting too. Then Matt was giving me the low down on his DirecTV set up. All in all, an informative and enjoyable afternoon. As Gretchen and I were driving back to our parents' houses, we realized that we didn't exactly know how to get there. We were cracking ourselves up for some reason. We finally figured it out. Man, driving around on back roads with Gretchen, half-lost, made me feel like I was seventeen again. The only thing missing was the obligatory drive-by of Gretchen's then-boyfriend's house to see if his truck was in the driveway.
I think it was the next weekend when Jim and I went driving all over Hell's half-acre looking at houses. We were trying to ascertain exactly how far away from civilization we are willing to live. We got pretty far out. But it was a beautiful day, as you can see from the pictures that I took. Look at the sky! And the leaves! I swear that I didn't alter those pictures in any way, other than to crop them a little bit. But those colors are just what showed up when I pressed the button. Man, it was gorgeous.
Jim and I have been doing a lot of driving around looking at houses, but we haven't found anything that we're really interested in since the two that we wanted that got sold (see previous entry for details on that story). I am sure (and my readers have assured me) that the right house will come along when the time is right. And I enjoy looking. I'm just impatient! I want to move out of this apartment, like now. But I also know that even when we find the house, if we get it, it will take a while to process everything and actually get to move in. Which is fine, since we have to give notice to our landlords. I have gotten to see parts of Central New York that I never knew existed. Good thing we have a great map.
This last picture is kind of funny. If you read my weblog, you may remember that back in July, I was interviewed for a newspaper series about personal finance, and I had my picture in the paper on a Monday. The Sunday prior, they had a big teaser about the series, with my big fat head on the upper right corner of the Business section. So I got a lot of calls about that one -- "Hey, you're in the paper!" My mom even found out about it, all the way in Rochester. So I thought after the article was published, it would all die down. Until we had our book group meeting early in October, and Hayley was like, "Did you know that you're on a billboard on 690?" I'm what? 690 is the main highway that runs east to west through Syracuse. Apparently, the newspaper bought a billboard, and for the graphic, used the issue of the Sunday paper that had my big fat head in the corner. So that's what's in that picture. My famous billboard. How funny. Not that many people have noticed it though -- I mean, when you're zipping along at 65 MPH, it's kind of difficult to see.
Okay, so if you made it all the way to the end of this long entry, here's your reward (which isn't much of a reward, because if you read the weblog, you already know). Jim and I got engaged on Halloween! We're getting married! I'm so excited. Believe me, details will be forthcoming. Maybe I'll even update more than twice in November! But all we know right now is that the wedding will most likely be in Central New York (as opposed to my hometown) and take place in the fall of 2002. Thanks for reading!