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The Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn

I'll admit it - I used to watch The Daily Show. A lot. I'm pretty sure I watched the very first episode, and we used to watch it every night when we lived in Michigan. It was really funny, the writing was sharp and I liked most of the people on the show. I really, really liked Lizz Winstead, and the interactions between her and Craig Kilborn. She always seemed to be making a little fun of Craig for his piggish ways, but letting him know that she was also kind of kidding.

In the beginning, I wasn't a big fan of Craig Kilborn, but he seemed really happy to be hosting the show, and was able to make fun of himself. Then the show became Comedy Central's highest rated show (this was before South Park existed), and "Kilby" started believing his own press releases. He gave an interview to Esquire where he said that Lizz would "blow him" if he asked her to - and he was suspended and Lizz left the show. It hasn't been the same since.

So now "Craiggers" has taken over for Tom Snyder on The Late Late Show. It is so obvious that CBS is desperate for some semblance of a young demographic - Craig is a hit with the college kids, ya know. I tuned in to the show during the first week to see how it was doing.

Craig Kilborn thinks he is God's gift to women, as well as some sort of icon to frat boys everywhere. May I remind him that most of his funny lines on The Daily Show were written by writers? He actually seems kind of dim, as witnessed by his interactions with guests. They will make a reference to something that he doesn't understand, and he quickly changes the subject.

Anyway, the set for the show is supposed to represent a sort of swinging bachelor pad, circa 1957, I think. There's a piano and some groovy furniture. And here's the kicker (and what Craig discussed in oh, I don't know - every single interview he did to promote the show) -- a working wet bar! Yes, that's right, Craig drinks alcoholic beverages! I just can't stand how cool he is.

The show has carried over the "Five Questions" and "Moment for Us" segments from the Daily Show. "Five Questions" used to be funny because it showed celebrities as normal people, who may or may not be very smart. Now it seems like an opportunity for the writers to show off how funny they are instead of an opportunity to learn something about the guest. I can't even discuss how much the "Moment for Us" has always annoyed me.

The night I watched the show, the first guest was Jeff Goldblum. The two of them kind of sat there and congratulated each other on how smart they are. I learned nothing interesting about Jeff Goldblum. Maybe there isn't anything interesting about Jeff Goldblum.

The second guest was Jonny Mosely, the Olympic champion freestyle mogul skier. (Oooh - extreme sports! Way to appeal to that target demo, CBS!). Jonny was none too bright, but he was kind of funny. Craig seemed to know nothing about skiing - way to do your homework, Craiggers!

The final guests of the evening were 2 of the stars of the Spanish version of Charlie's Angels. Craig kind of stared at their bodies and babbled about his teenage lust for Farrah. One of the women tried to discuss how she wants to portray a strong, fit woman who is a good role model for young girls, and Craig cut her off so he could have his picture taken with them in the Angels pose.

I flipped by the show the other night and Vince Vaughn was on. They were talking about chicks and swingers and martinis or something. I quickly changed the channel.

So I'm assuming from what I've seen that Craig will continue to have as guests only swinging bachelors and hot babes. It's kind of like The Playboy Mansion on TV. Actually, that's probably exactly what he's going for. The only problem with my hatred of all things Kilborn is that my personal goddess, Janeane Garofolo, appears to be friends with him. Oh well, part of Janeane's shtick is her poor choices in men, right?

My conclusion - Craig Kilborn needs to get over his fear of women. And get a soul. And get off my damn TV.